Yearly Horoscope – Taurus

I grew up with a brother who was assigned Taurus at birth and so I am wary of you Taurus types. I know what you are like and I’m right to look askance at you all.


  • Cheat at monopoly because you’re the race car and the race car gets to drive past ‘go to jail’ and also drives past the streets that your siblings own so you don’t have to pay rent
  • Cheat at chess by telling me the white set have more moves and can do more and you always play the white set so your siblings always lose. Ok now I think about it this is totally woke and you Taurans clearly have a very real sense of White Privilege and were teaching your siblings a lesson that white people have it way better for no reason at all.
  • Hit your siblings all the time  and rip their jigsaws in half
  • Write things like ‘Moylen was here’ on the wall in texta and then say your sibling has done it and get angry when parents don’t believe you (possibly because your sibling had not learned to write yet)
  • Hang your siblings toys by the feet up over their bed at night and tell sibling the toys screamed all night and then NOT LET THEM BE CUT DOWN
  • Tell sibling your teddy bear needs an operation and take over half of their pocket money for year to pay for it.  Hrm again, you are pretty woke, this is a good example of teaching a small child how taxes and healthcare works.

So really, what I’m saying to those Bull headed Taurans who come to this page, you probably deserve whatever miserable life you have for tormenting your sibling.


Yearly Horoscope – Taurus

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