Virgos are repressed and exacting. Sort of like Incels. Are all Incels Virgos? I’d ask them but I assume they’d just sneer and call me a Chad or a Stacey or possibly a normie. If you’re on this page and reading this, it should be quite obvious that I’m not a normie. But perhaps I don’t understand the terminology well enough.

I don’t understand Virgos either and their obsession with virginity. Seems a really odd thing to be really into. I mean, it’s like anything. If a virgo never wears a hat, then they celebrate a head that has never been crowned by a hat, then one day they say “Gosh the sun is bright I need some eye protection” and then they do decide to wear a hat, the only difference in them is that now they’ve worn a hat, right? And they know what it feels like to wear a hat now?

The value of their head hasn’t changed because it’s been hatted on occasion. You don’t have to accept that you’re, say, supposed to wear a different colour if you marry (but only if you’re female) because you wore a hat once. You don’t have to have horrible people judge you because of your backwards cap. Putting on or taking off an item of head clothing is an experience you can only do one time as a first, and has literally nothing to do with how other people should treat or judge you. Women and men who wear hats can be treated equally. Women don’t get hat-shamed for putting on a fascinatior and going to the races.

So yeah, this is pretty much how much sense the worship of virginity as a concept is. I suspect anyone who has been outed as a virgo has hated it. I suggest we change this star sign horoscope to ‘GAIA’  or earth mother/father. Much better.